Dear _____________,

so, you're finally coming today.  

i remember laying in bed talking to your momma from across the house months and months ago.  it had been a long day, and your dad was driving back from class 'down south'.  the whole day your mom had been meaning to tell me about a dream, but she didn't get around to it until right before bed that night.  we talked about it, and after months of speculation and confusion, i suggested that maybe the dream made sense, and that maybe she had been/was pregnant.  

and what do you know?  she was!  with you, big boy.  

those next few weeks were scary and exciting as we waited to hear if everything was okay, and we also waited to see if you had 16 brothers and sisters in there with you.  your mom was sick enough to have about 17 babies, so it made sense to us at the time.  

the morning that your dad and mom went in to meet your for the first time, i hung out with your big brother and sister.  elias and i were sitting upstairs playing while glory slept, when your mom texted me to say she was pregnant with quadruplets, and that's when your auntie lauren cursed at your mom.  but i won't repeat that now.  

of course she was just playing with my mind, and we found out that a healthy boy was due on june 8.  it seemed impossibly far away, but elias and i had a talk that day about little brothers and how much fun he would have with you.  and then elias wanted to talk about cars, so we did.  you will probably like cars too, but you'll like elias so much more.  

he is going to be such a strong big brother for you.  he'll teach you how to love your daddy and mommy, and how to take care of your sister.  speaking of which, we haven't even talk about glory yet.  boy, are you in for a treat, and for a challenge.  this girl is going to be your best friend, but she will also give you a run for your money.  a couple of days ago, she already did.  with a swift kick to your shin while you were still hanging out in your mommy.  i don't think you liked that so much.  but that's okay, it toughened you up for the big dance.

now, _________, i won't really be around much once you get here.  but i already know you and love you.  i pray that you already know how fortunate you are, and how much love you are born into today.  how your nonny flew all the way out to seattle just to get a glimpse of you, and how hard your mom has worked to get you here safely.  how awesome your dad is, and what a leader he is and will continue to be for both your family and the body of Christ.  

when you get older, i can tell you all kinds of stories about when you were in your mom's belly, like how you were always asking your mom for more peanut butter cup ice cream, and how your mom puked in front of a bunch of volunteers because you weren't feeling so good one day.

_________, these words and stories aren't eloquent or well written, because i'm nervous and excited and can't really think straight because you are being born today.  i am trying not to be selfish and think about the fact that i am not there to meet you. 

you are going to have so many fun friends in washington, silas and salem, and sweet baby pearce.  they are just going to love you!

what do you look like, anyway?  can you give me a hint, please?  

mr. _________, here's the thing, you have an amazing family both near and far.  great real aunts and uncles.  i'm just a fake one, but when you get a little older, let's go on some adventures, okay?  lots of walks outside, and when you and e&g come down here to visit, we can camp out, and wrestle in the grass with beulah (you can ask elias about pup pup), and we'll get dirty and sleep outside in the dirt, so your parents won't have to:)  

okay, i have lots more to tell you, but i shouldn't overwhelm you on your first day.  there's more time for orientation.  lots and lots more time.  

i pray that no matter the ebbs and flows of life, and growing up in ministry that this would be the prayer of your heart:

Psalm 73:23-28

²³ "Yet I am always with you; 

       you hold me by your right hand.

 ²⁴ You guide me with your counsel, 

       and afterward you will take me into glory.

 ²⁵ Whom have I in heaven but you? 

       And earth has nothing I desire besides you.

 ²⁶ My flesh and my heart may fail, 

       but God is the strength of my heart 

       and my portion forever.

 ²⁷ Those who are far from you will perish; 

       you destroy all who are unfaithful to you.

 ²⁸ But as for me, it is good to be near God. 

       I have made the Sovereign LORD my refuge; 

       I will tell of all your deeds."

love you, Sweet boy.  

lar lar

blessings still flowing

right up until the end.

on tuesday, march 4, 2008, i came to new beginnings.

on wednesday, march 4, 2009, we found out that victoria was further along than we had estimated.  victoria and i made plans to walk a lot over the next week as a means of inducing labor, so that i could be here when the baby is born.

jessi, vic, and i talked all afternoon about when we hoped she would be born, and i sent up quick prayers all day long that i would still be here.  

just like every wednesday, the girls and i planned our 'night out'.  this week we had planned to order pizza and make ice cream sundaes.  

as soon as i walked in the door, pizza in hand, i was instructed to sit down in the living room. they told me while i was gone, they had gotten a call from the midwife saying that because of some suspicious test results that they would be inducing her labor the next day.  

i fought back tears, and on wednesday night, i watched as victoria learned what she would be experiencing the next day, from our 'on-call' doula.  i watched as she introduced herself to the parents of her daughter.  and i watched as she said goodnight to her mom, and wondered what emotions could be coursing between the two of them as they hugged goodnight.  

on wednesday, march 5, 2008, jessi, kendra, and i went to my very first doctor's appointment with one of the girls, and i looked, in awe, at my first ever ultrasound.  

on thursday, march 5, 2009, just a few floors up from that doctor's office, jess and i sat together, again, waiting on a baby.  this time feeling like veterans.  

   "Give thanks to the LORD, call on his name; 

    make known among the nations what he has done, 

    and proclaim that his name is exalted.

     Sing to the LORD, for he has done glorious things; 

       let this be known to all the world.

     Shout aloud and sing for joy, people of Zion, 

       for great is the Holy One of Israel among you."

Isaiah 12:4-6

my top moments of the week

• some solid time with elias and glory on sunday morning.  
• hilarious house meeting on sunday night with all three girls.  lots of pregnancy questions, talk about 7-eleven, and promises from the girls to "be really, really good this week". 
• watching the bachelor with jess.  
• monday, we were able to get one of our girls into a really great doctor's office, which is awesome.  it was really sweet to see her treated well, and really come out of her shell some during the appointment, and generally in the house.
• our newest girl.  i never really know what is okay to share, and what's not.  but oh, do we have stories.  let's just say, she is an endless source of good stories.  AND she has never been to wendy's, taco bell, or subway.  
• tuesday, i had a doctor's appointment.  the lady i saw is one of the midwives that has worked with a few of our girls.  during the appointment the following was said, "well, you need to go ahead and find mr. right, and start having babies, because you only have about 10 more really fertile years".  listen, lady, i am surrounded by 'fertility' almost as much as you are, don't play, i get it.
• the pure excitement of postpartum roller skating, and trampoline jumping.  
• dentist visit in little vietnam.  really strange, and for some reason there were about 11 or 12 hole-in-the-wall dentist's offices within one block.  very strange, and i watched mr. rogers (in vietnamese), and he sang this song (for some reason he switched to english for this part): 

Some are fancy on the outside. 

Some are fancy on the inside. 

Everybody's fancy. 

Everybody's fine. 

Your body's fancy and so is mine. 

Boys are boys from the beginning. 

Girls are girls right from the start. 

Everybody's fancy. 

Everybody's fine. 

Your body's fancy and so is mine. 

Girls grow up to be the mommies. 

Boys grow up be the daddies.

Everybody's fancy. 

Everybody's fine. 

Your body's fancy and so is mine. 

I think you're a special person 

And I like your ins and outsides. 

Everbody's fancy. 

Everybody's fine. 

Your body's fancy and so is mine. 

• my first ever trip to pf changs with jess and kal.  it was exactly what i needed, and just really fun.  love them.  shout out to leigh and gray for the gift card!
• today, sitting here listening to our somali girl watching maury povich.  
• catching up on lost, and hopefully the office and 30 rock sometime today!
• and it's valentine's day, and i'm not even a little bitter about it.

 

quickie

headed out to the grocery store.  

i went to the doctor with one of the girls yesterday.  it was awesome.  i forgot!  i just forgot how exciting this process can be, if we are 'let in'.  

in other news, jess may have convinced me that i am getting sympathy sickness from all these pregnant pukers.  i had 2 slices of toast for lunch.  it's all mental, i know it.  but still..it's painful to watch them try to eat.  like they're being tortured.  that is..unless they're pounding a chalupa.  

also, if you feel like praying for a puppy, you could pray for beulah, actually more for me, because she got fixed on tuesday, and trying to keep that crazy contained, is almost impossible. poor thing, she can't run around and play at all.  so maybe Jesus, you can magically take away some of the energy.  forever, Lord?  maybe just take some of the energy for eternity.  that'd be great.  for real. 

must go, fred meyer is wondering where we've been.