too much.

there is too much going on to even try to talk about it.  i feel like i have said the phrase 'too much' 50 times in the last few days.  

definitely too much food, too much decadence, way too much ice cream, and more mexican food than you can shake a stick at.  

as i sit here in our living room, my body is saying too much, and so is my heart.  tuesday is steadily nearing, and i can't quite figure it out.  i don't even want to be dramatic about this year coming to an end, but it's not just a year.  as much as i would want to try to explain what it is like to live here, and as funny as the stories can sometimes be, you just can't understand the intensity of this year, and the camaraderie it has taken to get through it (and the Jesus).  

talking about the connollys has merged into how i feel when i write about my brothers, they are so close to 'home' that it almost feels like i am being prideful when i talk about them.  so, talking about leaving, and not standing around in the kitchen together, just seems like too much.  

i'm not quite ready to do it, so please excuse my denial.